A bit of TMI coming....this time round I've had really good ewcm and for a few days straight which makes me think that this is a good chance month.
Well...it would be a good chance month if I could just get my bloody man to play the game!!! Mate I tell ya getting any off that man is like pulling blood from a stone lol. And sometimes I just want to scream at him to just do me once! Just once and at least I won't have to spend the next 2 wks pissed off because we wasted an opportunity and there's nothing worse that waiting for AF knowing that she's definately coming! But I summon all my strength (and I mean every last drop of it) and I smile and I TRY to remember that I am staying positive, that I need to relax, that it is not a race and it doesn't matter that its been a year.
Now I've got that off my chest I will proceed to clarify this situation in a calm and reasonable manner so as not to make my man look like...well I dunno what it seems like but can't seem right.
You see my man and I operate on quite different levels of 'need' shall we say. I could have it several times a week...him not so worried. Don't get me wrong this part of our relationship is great and I am happy with it and am not complaining and go with the flow on it. However I'm a bit uptight about it because I just know what's going to happen is that I'm about to ov any moment now and it'll be like half way through next week and he'll be keen. Never mind I've practically spent the weekend trying to jump him or anything.
I've got to give the guy a break though he's working very long hours these days and gets real tired so the last thing he wants to do is 'that' sometimes. And I guess sometimes my overactive mind has me thinking that he's avoiding it because he's still not that keen on the idea of kids or something. Then I don't want to force the bding because I don't want it to be a chore.
Man how I wish I could rewind my mind back to 12mths ago when I was blissfully unaware...ahh those were the days :)
Men are a bit like children... Who am I kidding? They are big children. The hard you push, the more resistent they become. They've also got this problem where they need to operate a penis too. Us girls can lay back and take it if we're not quite in the mood, where as blokes have to actually make the appendage work...and half filled spongey effort it isn't going to cut the mustard... not to mention the fact that they don't then orgasm hard which means less sperm of not so hot quality. Sex is psychological for us but it can be for them too. If they have any kind of fear that they can't get it to work, they are more likely just to flatly decline. Believe me...from very personal experience, it is better that way...
ReplyDeleteUnfortunately, I don't have any awesome answers. For us, when I changed focus, stopped giving a shit and started looking at furhter study etc, I told him roughly when it was likely to happen and kind of went about my business... then I got laid...and then..we got pregnant.
Now don't get me wrong, not saying relaxing did it, or him being relaxed etc. But in terms of boy operation, everthing work at the right time when I wasn't flapping around like a horny devil around ovulation time.
Ermm... am I kind of getting the message across??
Remember, really, if you're OPKs are only just starting to get darker then you are still appproaching ovulation. You hit a critical time when that OPK goes positive. Then you need to get down and dirty that day/night or the next. Anything before that is simply a bonus and ensures you've got some extra supplies hanging out at your ovaries waiting for that egg.
Keeping testing and good luck!
BTW EWCM is great... sperm's favourite medium to travel in!
Haha I somehow knew you would day something like that. Maybe I need to actually say to him that we're getting ripe for the picking instead of subtly trying to get some lol. Thanks GS - you're a real gem!
ReplyDeleteYep yep. A lot of guys don't actually know there is a window in which we are fertile and that timing is actually very important. Way back when started really properly trying I explained it in really simples terms and each cycle would tell him the time when we the window was open (i.e. when I started to see EWCM or sometimes just watery cause my CM wasn't great) and the time when I was officially ripe. (i.e. positive OPK). So there was basically time to mentally prepare and get some in if he was up to it, before performance time.
ReplyDeleteI think the most important thing... as ENORMOUSLY HARD as it may be... if it doesn't happen try not to completly go off the deep end. Blokes don't know how to respond to that very well and starts the pressure snowball I was talking about earlier. That doesn't mean you have to pretend like you don't give a toss but there needs to be that middle ground. Him knowing it is important to you is good but him feeling like he's failed you is counter productive.