Punishing Myself

The ultimate form of punishment to a fertility challenged person?

16 and pregnant.

Why oh why do we put ourselves through that crap? It has me riveted and its the same rubbish EVERY single time I watch. The fertility of these 16yr olds is like a kick in the guts. At that age I was no where near thinking about doing 'it' with anyone - its such a big decision for someone so young to make.
Hmm anywho.

I hate the 2ww by the way. I just want to know the outcome and I want to know it now! Even though I know its negative. You know how I know this? The normal cramps, shittiness and wanting chocolate. I try not to each chocolate biscuits, I might sneak one when the packet is open. Yesterday I just couldn't help myself and opened a pack of to.fee pops. Uh oh! Now they're half gone AND I've just topped off a double choc t.rumpet ice-cream (if you don't know what either of those are then you are missing out people!).
So yeah THAT's how I know AF is on her merry way.

And all that chocolate is really flying in the face of the 12wk challenge ain't it! On that I found out more about the challenge I signed up for lol. Evidently its kind of like the big.gest loser tehehe. So they take our measurements and weight then we track over the 12wks and record how many cm's we lose over that time. Luckily I'd actually done my measurements last week as I'd started tracking that kind of stuff and keeping a food diary so it wasn't such a surprise. Definately some numbers there that need to be lower. Then there was the gym scales. EEEK!!!!! Weighed in about 5kgs heavier than my ones at home. Thankfully the chick there believes that they're out as she weighed herself there then no less than an hour later at the doctors and was 5kgs lighter at the doctors. I'm willing to believe her with that! Anyway as long as the numbers go down doesn't matter where I weigh myself I guess.

And that's the 12wks challenge. My goal is to attend 3-4 classes at the gym then training for netball and games that should do my week well. I'm actually feeling rather motivated about this. I just have to get the darn eating like crap under control.

Hmm.

Not much else to tell from here really. All prepared for work next week but now busy with a local community event on the weekend so tomorrow will be spent preparing the food for that. Saturday I'm up at 5.30am to leave for netball then back in the afternoon to help with the catering. Then I agreed to stick around until the bar closes at 12am! Stoopid I know. Someone has to do it and since I'm out most of the morning for netball I kinda felt I should. It'll be ok I can sleep the day away on Sunday.

One last interesting snippet - the fella is forever saying stupid shit when it comes to ttc. Like this afternoon - we'd just had some *ahem* random nookie and he made a comment about ttc related stuff to which I told him it wasn't the right time. He then said 'that doesn't matter does it?'...seriously? Yes honey timing is everything and as I explained it is too close to 'rags' for anything to happen. His exasperated reply was something like 'man am I ever going to get it at the right time!'
Silly and very random story! But I am pretty sure he doesn't know the importance of timing however perhaps I need to be more explicit!